Inside Out -->

Not much has happened this week thus far. No doctors, except for blood work, so there's nothing to report on the health front except that I feel good :) and that's worth something I suppose!
Anyway, though the week has been seemingly uneventful, I did have something happen to me today that I cannot recall ever happening in my 19 years of life. I was driving home from the ice cream social at church when I got stopped by a red light. It was beginning to get darker out so people had their lights turned on which meant I could see the headlights of the person behind me in my mirrors. Once I came to a stop, I put on my blinker and the truck behind me did the same. I began playing this little game like I always do where I watch my blinker and watch the blinker of the person behind me or in front of me and compare the speeds of blinking. I'll usually keep the time of my blinker with one hand and the other with the other hand and see if I can concentrate enough to keep up with both but tonight was different. For the first time ever, my blinker and this trucks blinker stayed in perfect time with one another for the entire red light!! I have never in my life found two blinkers that blinked at the same rate until tonight. I couldn't believe it! I wanted to follow that truck and tell the driver this wonderful news but I figured that would end up being slightly awkward so I just drove home in amazement.
I have never understood why blinkers don't have a standard rate of blinking and that has always bothered me so tonight I finally have some peace. There are blinkers in the world that can blink together.

Inside Out -->

This morning was a splendid morning and, seeing as it is Sunday, I went to church. In my home church we are currently in a series called 'Objections Overruled!' which is addressing the 7 major objections people have against christianity. The objection we discussed today was '#6 Science Has Disproved Christianity.' Naturally, I came with the expectation that I would be learning about both sides of this argument and how best to address the conflict when faced with it. And that is exactly what happened. What is odd about that you may ask? I expected to learn about the topic for the day, I listened to the sermon on that topic, and I learned about the topic. Big whoop right? But that's just it. I came to church with the expectation that I would be learning; but, because the sermon was not about healing or miracles or divine intervention, I was not going to hear anything from God that was in any way related to what is happening in my personal life today. And that made me think. How many times do I come to church and completely miss out on what God is trying to tell me simply because the sermon title appears to be unrelated to my present struggles? Or, for that matter, how many times in my daily life do I miss God's voice simply because I'm not in the church walls and have no expectations for God to speak outside of the box I have put Him in within my own mind? Wow, that really hit me hard. I know God can speak to me whenever and wherever He pleases, but today I realized that there are many times when I just might not be listening, and I am going to change that.

On that same note, I am very thankful that today God chose to speak to me despite my low expectations. He made sure I heard His word for me through someone else. During the invitation at the end of the sermon, a man came up to me seemingly about to burst. God's word for me was weighing so heavy on his heart and mind that he could barely get it out. The presence of God was very evident and so I listened to every word. This man challenged me with the question, "Do you believe God can heal you? And not in your head, not with your logic, but in your heart. Do you believe God can heal you?" Yet again, wow! God had my number :) I started to think about my answer to this question and I realized that I couldn't fully say yes. I've been raised in a christian home and I know God's Word and since His Word says He can heal I believe it but that has nothing to do with matters of the heart. Many times I believe because I know it's the right thing but I really feel now that God is saying I need to make it personal. I need to let it sink in, not only that He can heal, but He is MY healer. Not only does He provide, but He is MY provider. Not only is He the God of peace, but He is MY peace. He is MY strength, MY comfort, and MY Father who loves me and wants to make me whole. And I am letting that sink in.

Thank you, Lord, that you are a good God who will move even when I have 'put you in a box.' I now believe in my mind AND in my heart that I will be healed. Thank you, God.

Mama C: The Blurrrr of the Past Two Weeks

Well, this is the first opportunity I have had to post anything to Kailen's new found friend...er...I mean...blog. Kailen has done a great job keeping up with and blogging the events of the past two weeks. And, yes, blurrrrr is the best word to explain it.

Overall, we have all made it thus far in pretty good shape. It only takes a couple of minutes of talking with Kailen to see and hear God's peace and grace is covering her daily. And, as she has stated several times in her previous posts, God's hand has and is leading us each step of the way! (Thank you, Jesus!)

We are now is somewhat of a holding pattern until our visit to Mayo Clinic on September 29. I am in the process of getting all of her medical visits, bloodwork, tests, etc. together so we can handcarry all of that to her first doctor's visit there. Until then, it's lots of rest, eating healthy, rest, exercise, and more rest for Kailen. And, for the rest of us, it's "just keep walking, just keep walking, just keep walking, walking, walking."

Thank you to everyone for your prayers and words of encouragement. We truly can feel the strength of the body of Christ as we travel this road. (Oh, and, just a little explanation of the name Kailen gave to this blog...after the colonoscopy when the doctor was delivering the "life-altering" news, we got to the end of the conversation and I looked over at Kailen and said, "Well, Kailen, what are you thinking or feeling right now?" She looked me in the eyes and very firmly and confidently said, "Well...it's not the end of the line." Hence the name of her blog "not the end of the line..."

Much love & thanks to all!

Mama C

Medical- UK visit!!

Yesterday was a looooong day. My parents and I went down to UK to officially withdraw from this semester and apply for disability. (I was telling someone earlier that same sentence and immediately thought thereafter 'Wow, that makes me sound awesome.' haha) Anyway, yes I am officially taking a semester off.

The whole visit went really well and was very productive. Not only did we take care of my classes, housing, scholarship, and disability application BUT, we even found out that I will be getting a sweet hanidcap parking tag when I return to campus in the spring :) I can't lie, I'm pretty darn excited about that! As much as I try to deny it, that is really going to be a blessing for me. I'm not frail by any means but some days I truly am just too tired to get across that parking lot! I so wish we would've known about this office last year because they take care of so many things for you. They will send out a letter to all my professors at the beginning of every semester spelling out what I deal with and possible scenarios that I may encounter, they will stand up for me if any professor does not acknowledge the things I struggle with, and they will even give me my own room for exams and up to 50-100% extra time granted to take exams! God is sooo good and has completely taken care of me for when I am able to return to campus.

I have to say though, it was very hard to be on campus knowing I wasn't coming back. Not that I don't love being home, because I do, but there's just something about that autumn excitement and buzz on campus that makes it so exciting to go back each fall. My dad brought to my attention that this will be the first time in my life, that I can clearly recall, when I haven't been in school. How odd is that? I have been in some form of school since I was 4 years old and this will be my first ever 'break' since then. If I look at it that way I get a little more excited. I am realizing there is so much I can accomplish this semester and now I'm ready to get to work! So, the day was an overall success and I am at peace with my decision and ready to work on getting healthy!

I am pleased to announce that my first accomplishment of the semester is that this morning I woke up and officially made biscuits and gravy all by myself...and completely vegan, too! (If you have ever attempted this you will appreciate the gravy part :) It tastes that much better when you do it yourself.

Oh, and my favorite quote of the day was from the lady in the disability office who said "It's hard because she's learning how to function like an old person as a young person."...and sadly, I have to admit she is right! That sentence pretty much sums up my life as of late.

Medical- Pulmonologist Visit/ Bloodwork results

Today I went to see my pulmonologist (lung doctor). They did a few chest x-rays to see if it would even be an option for me to try they drug remicade(a drug used to put UC into remission), and good news is my lungs are in the clear!! If anything, at least I have good lungs right :) He said I could try remicade but the decision was really up to us. If I did start it, he would be monitoring my lung activity very closely to make sure there is no infection and to catch anything at the earliest possible stage. Still, it would be a pretty high risk considering my lung history with pneumonia. Now we are at a point where we will decide after I visit the Mayo Clinic in September. My doctors down there will be the deciding factor for the best course of action.

I did also get some bloodwork results back today.

-My INR (thick or thinness of blood) is back down to 4.6, praise God! Last weeks 10.2 was a bit of a scare!

-My hemoglobin (iron count in the blood) is down slightly from last time, which is probably due to the colonoscopy, but it is still better than it used to be.

-And my ferritin (iron stores) is all the way up to 400 from 6!!! That is a huge praise which means the infusions worked.

So my blood tests are all at good levels but now we need it to stay that way. When it starts to stay at good levels that means my colon is healing so be praying for consistent and steady bloodwork!

(Just another cool God moment- my pulmonologist 'just so happens' to have a sister-in-law who had ulcerative colitis and who went through all I'm going through right now :) So, he knows all that we are dealing with and has a personal tie to my story. How good is God?? LOVE it.)

Medical- Diagnosis

So, you all may or may not know that I had a colonoscopy last Tuesday. We were fairly confident that we would recieve good news but as it turned out the news was just the opposite. This is an e-mail that my mom sent out explaining things. I wanted to share and let you all know what is going on so here it is!...

Dear Family & Friends,As many of you know, Kailen had a colonoscopy Tuesday and we are now dealing with the findings from that colonoscopy. Below, I’ve tried to explain where things stand as briefly & thoroughly as possible. Please feel free to pass this information on to anyone you know who will join us in praying for Kailen’s healing.

Due to Kailen dealing with chronic anemia & having been diagnosed several years ago with ulcerative colitis, her doctors wanted to do a colonoscopy Tuesday to verify that she was not losing blood in her colon. As far as symptoms go, the ulcerative colitis has appeared to be in remission. However, the only way to verify the colon wasn’t bleeding was to do a colonoscopy. The report from the colonoscopy was not good. The doctor didn’t go all the way through her colon for fear of perforating the colon. He labeled what he saw as severe ulcerative colitis and said it was as bad as he’s seen.

Medically speaking, there is one option considered to be a definite option, colon removal, and one possible option, a drug called Remicade, an immunosuppressant. One of the contraindications of Remicade is a lung history of pneumonia, which Kailen has a history of. In other words, because the drug wipes out your immune system, it is not uncommon for people on Remicade to die from respiratory failure, especially if they have a history of lung infections. The gastroenterologist also said Kailen’s colon remaining in the state it is currently in would definitely lead to 1) cancer or 2) the colon perforating itself, and he would like for all of us together to have arrived at a plan of treatment by December.

We are approaching this from several perspectives— spiritually, medically, and naturopathically: · Spiritually — we have been, are, and will continue to ask & believe God for total & complete healing in her colon.· Medically — we will meet with her pulmonoligist to get his input on her lungs & Remicade. We will also meet with an infectious disease specialist at the request of the gastroenterologist.· Naturopathically — Kailen has been vegan now for 2 months and will continue that same course. She is also taking several supplements which have proven to be good for the colon and have achieved positive results in people diagnosed with ulcerative colitis. We would like to ask you to join us in praying for Kailen’s healing. We would also like prayer for wisdom & peace as we walk out these next few months. We are so thankful you are our family & friends.

...So I hope that helps you all understand kind of what is going on. If you have any questions or anything feel free to call/text/message whatever. I've been a bit shocked by the news but I'm not unwilling to talk about it :) I know God is still God and there is no definite "end of the line" until He says so!

Love you all.

Inside Out -->

Well, this is the official first posting for my blog!! What a rush. I suppose I should kick things off by kind of explaining the purpose of this whole thing.

-First off, I thought it would be fun :) I've always loved getting my thoughts out so why not? Thus, I've decided to call my thinking blogs 'Inside Out,' getting thoughts out from the inside... yeah.

-Anyway, I also wanted to use this as a way to communicate to family and friends about what exactly is going on with all my health stuff. I'll be out of school this semester and there will be lots of updates so a blog seemed like an easy solution for communication.

-Lastly, I will also just be posting random thoughts and fun ideas. I will be having mucho time to think and do nothing so I thought I might as well share some of what I have been pondering on.

So, I hope you enjoy reading some of this, if not then you can just get the medical update and be done with it :) Use this how you will but have a blessed day!